The whole point of doing this blog was to gather amusing stories of our trips to random football grounds.
So far, we've performed poorly in this respect.
Don't think anyone is going to Doncaster tomorrow either.
Thank God for Blackpool away for the weekend at the end of the month, and Cardiff away on the 30th to see our occasional IFA's son be the mascot. It's the IFA that's occasional, not the son. Father and son are permanently related.
It will get funnier, no really, it will.....
Match Day 5 - Newcastle at the Ricoh
The Carling Cup returned to the Ricoh, almost a year on from West Ham's lucky 1-0 last minute win in the 4th round last season.
This year, due to a combination of inept rail connections and lack of car parking tickets, none of us could get there. So the Sports Caff on Haymarket was the venue, along with some new skyblue friends, who had also had the same idea.
A good first 20 minutes was thrown away with some inept defending and goalkeeping, leading to a 45 minute score of 0-2. The Geordies would have put their shirts on a win from this point. If they hadn't already lost them.
More reasons curled one into the top corner in injury time, to make it a slightly more optimistic 1-2 at half time. The second half came and almost went. Gunnar threw in an exocet in the 93rd minute, which Dann buried in the bottom corner. Extra time, surely our name was on the Cup?
Owen scored. Then Oh Lord flashed a header against the bar from 3 yards out. Our chance had gone. The Sky blue faithful prayed, but to no avail. 2-3 the final score
We can at least concentrate on the League. And the proper Cup in January.
This year, due to a combination of inept rail connections and lack of car parking tickets, none of us could get there. So the Sports Caff on Haymarket was the venue, along with some new skyblue friends, who had also had the same idea.
A good first 20 minutes was thrown away with some inept defending and goalkeeping, leading to a 45 minute score of 0-2. The Geordies would have put their shirts on a win from this point. If they hadn't already lost them.
More reasons curled one into the top corner in injury time, to make it a slightly more optimistic 1-2 at half time. The second half came and almost went. Gunnar threw in an exocet in the 93rd minute, which Dann buried in the bottom corner. Extra time, surely our name was on the Cup?
Owen scored. Then Oh Lord flashed a header against the bar from 3 yards out. Our chance had gone. The Sky blue faithful prayed, but to no avail. 2-3 the final score
We can at least concentrate on the League. And the proper Cup in January.
Match Day 4 - Bristol City (H)
The Wheels on the bus fell off.
0-3
Westwood and Eastwood both injured. Dele scored one and set one up. Coleman sent to the stands.
Apart from that, a good day's work....
0-3
Westwood and Eastwood both injured. Dele scored one and set one up. Coleman sent to the stands.
Apart from that, a good day's work....
The Division II Trophy
From today's match day programme a picture from July 1967 of the squad with the trophy they had just won. There's George Curtis, Jimmy Hill and Derek Robbins. But who is that fresh-faced youth-team goalkeeper sitting behind the trophy? Look very carefully. I shall say this only once: DAVID ICKE.
Match Day 4 - Bristol City Home
It's (just) Friday and the lame excuses for not attending our second home league game roll in. The Youth Development Officer is in London limbering up for the Gay World Cup. Come on you Falcons. The Drinks Waiter is boozing in support. Our esteemed Marketing Manager is off at wedding with the outlaws (which is the official term for your girlfriend's parents whilst you are still married). Our IFA is on holiday with the kids. So it looks like it just me and Matt lined up for glory or doom at the Ricoh. I shouldn't bitch too much as it looks like I'll be stuck in London for the Newcastle game.
It's astounding, time is fleeting
Can it really only be three months since the last league away game ended in such shameful joy at Charlton. Barnsley start their home season with an opening ceremony that even Boris Johnson can better...
Madness takes its toll...
Cards all round as Barnsley lose the plot (the top two being the aftermath of Hume's foul on Miffy which should have been a straight red and the bottom being Leon McKenzie on the receiving end).
But listen closely, not for very much longer, I've got to keep control
A decent performance by the ref - did n't give them a nailed on handball-penalty and waved away two good shouts for us.
With your hands on your hips, you bring your knees in tight
A few snaps of the YDO's new goalkeeping hero - quite what he was doing putting goose-fat on his thighs at half-time all on his own in the dugout (Mr Ireland that is, not the YDO). And could the YDO have a word about the attire. Apropos of nothing here's a link to my favourite version of Oh Danny Boy.
Let's do the Time Warp again
Decent fish and chips, big flags, wooden gantries and small crowds - just like football used to be before modern out of town stadia.
In another dimension...
Hairdressers for their youth team - seems Barnsley have their priorities sorted for their nascent professional footballers. And as we all know the real footballing words to Manilow's meisterwerk are " At the Ricoh, Ricoh Arena....." " Coleman and Ranson are always in fashion at the Ricoh.."
With voyeuristic intention...
Not well secluded the copper plays a game of watching me watching you. A ha.
Spotlight on Vivienne
OK -I'm not sure if my nickname for Westwood will stick (it's got to be better than "Tim" - unless he is prone to drive by shootings of course) but I want you all to use it to see if we can match the success of the Gillian Darby meme.
One Trick Ponies
This is not one corner-kick - it's three "different" ones. Can we guess how successful they proved to be...
Half-time entertainment
Could the youth development officer confirm that it is a criminal offence for spectators to ass this point.
BFC 1 - CCFC 2
"Well, let's not start sucking each other's dicks quite yet." Winston Wolfe, Pulp Fiction.
Top of the league, 6 points from 2 games. What's not to like? Well here goes:
The Tykes had three great chances to score in 11 minutes before we scored with our first attack. Westwood once again our saved our defence's blushes. Individually the back four look strong but Dann and Fox have a tendency to linger on the ball which can leave them caught in possession in very dangerous positions.
Westwood saved us at the death when with 10 men Barnsley pushed for an equaliser. Indeed without Westwood we could easily be bottom with no points. As the Barnsley programme pointed out - we have kept only one clean sheet away from home in 20 league games (and that was at Southampton for a draw).
Gunnarson looked solid at right back but Mifsud's defensive cover work (apart from a sensational run into our box for a clearing header) was suspect. Sadly not much long-throwing in evidence. In Aron's absence Tabb played in the middle alongside Beuzelin (or Gollum Buzlun as the Barnsley PA garbled his name). Boozy hasn't yet got the pace of the Championship - he doesn't have as much time as he thinks and can get robbed too easily. Tabb took the first half to get into the swing of working alongside Boozy , allowing Boozy to sit deep and coming forward himself.
Gray will drive us mad with his inconsistency. He was instrumental in our first goal, showing (don't faint) bravery and persistence down the left to get the ball out to Freddie. Our second goal involved Gray in a great interchange with Freddie from which Gray took the ball onto his right foot about 12 yards out and planted it (the ball not his right foot) beyond the keeper at the far post. However he was guilty of an inexcusably bad cross. Having been released by Freddie he stormed down the left with Clinton and Mifsud roaring in through the middle and right. So he hit it miles beyond them toward the right corner-flag. This highlights our major weakness as a team - not being able to kill a game when in a dominant position. After Hume was rightly sent off (and with sub McKenzie on crossing the ball much more accurately from the left) we had several good chances to shut the game down, all spurned.
Enough of the misery - we won! And this leads me to the reason to be optimistic that this season's early burst of league-toppery will not have the same outcome as last season's. In Freddie Eastwood we have the best play-making centre-forward I've seen play for us. He looks so strong and assured on the ball that you can believe that it doesn't matter if we concede a goal because we will always score. And Morrison isn't bad either.
Match Day 3 - Barnsley Away
Three men went to mow, went to mow a meadow, three men and a dog called.....
Actually, one man went, Jim the lone pioneer. He returned with 3 points, a top of the table position, and hopefully some humourous tales and photos.
Actually, one man went, Jim the lone pioneer. He returned with 3 points, a top of the table position, and hopefully some humourous tales and photos.
YDO observations
The Youth Development Officer is pleased to note Danny Ireland's outing last night. It is to be hoped that more 17 year-olds shall be outed during the course of the season.
Given his tender years we should perhaps not be surprised that his sheet was not unblemished at the conclusion of the action.
Some hard sessions with Mr Westwood should help to develop the young Aussie's handling and ball skills.
This Office is planning to run the rule over youth-related events in the upcoming weeks, and shall keep you informed on our progress.
An interview on Sky Blues World with young Master Gunnarsson has indicated that some work on his oral skills should be included on his personal development plan.
YDO
Match Day 3 - Barnsley away
It's Thursday, and travel plans to Barnsley are being firmed up. Our Youth Development Officer is likely to be helping new friends celebrate their A level results, M is sorting out a house move, C is with children (younger than those with our YDO), leaving J as the sole travelling representative.
We look forward to his match report on Monday
We look forward to his match report on Monday
Match Day 2 - Aldershot at the Ricoh
No, really, it's Aldershot at home on Wednesday.
Will the Coalman go for Cup glory and play a full strength team, or will he rest the players who must be tired after 90 minutes of sheer hell so far this season.
Hope he plays the full strength team, we need another trip to Old Trafford which was the highlight of last season.
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A tidy 3-1 victory, with More Reasons getting the first, and Homer popping a couple in to see us through to the third round. Last season we got Carlisle away, this season we get Newcastle at the Ricoh in a couple of weeks. Game on.
Will the Coalman go for Cup glory and play a full strength team, or will he rest the players who must be tired after 90 minutes of sheer hell so far this season.
Hope he plays the full strength team, we need another trip to Old Trafford which was the highlight of last season.
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A tidy 3-1 victory, with More Reasons getting the first, and Homer popping a couple in to see us through to the third round. Last season we got Carlisle away, this season we get Newcastle at the Ricoh in a couple of weeks. Game on.
Match Day 1 - Norwich City at the Ricoh
Prediction - 3-0, Eastwood (2) Dann
The prediction wasn't great, right result, wrong goalscorers, but it was the highlight of the day.
A lorry in the Blackwall tunnel meant M and C spent almost 3 hours in traffic going nowhere, and missed the game.
For the record, dodgy penalty buried by Ward and a Leon MacKenzie tap-in following More reasons to shop at Morrison's cross-shot hit the bar.
Team
Westwood (Supercat)
Steve Wright (in the afternoon)
Dann (solid)
Fox (Cunning and solid)
Ward (deadly from 12 yards at either end)
Boozy (may well have been)
Gunnar (Olympic long throw prospect)
Tabb (Superhobbit replaced early by Homer)
Gray (must be almost time for the dressage in Beijing)
Freddy (Wheels on my house still go round and round)
Clinton (More reasons to shop at)
Man of the Match. No idea, but I'm going for Gunnar
Show pony of the Match. Gray. Probably
The prediction wasn't great, right result, wrong goalscorers, but it was the highlight of the day.
A lorry in the Blackwall tunnel meant M and C spent almost 3 hours in traffic going nowhere, and missed the game.
For the record, dodgy penalty buried by Ward and a Leon MacKenzie tap-in following More reasons to shop at Morrison's cross-shot hit the bar.
Team
Westwood (Supercat)
Steve Wright (in the afternoon)
Dann (solid)
Fox (Cunning and solid)
Ward (deadly from 12 yards at either end)
Boozy (may well have been)
Gunnar (Olympic long throw prospect)
Tabb (Superhobbit replaced early by Homer)
Gray (must be almost time for the dressage in Beijing)
Freddy (Wheels on my house still go round and round)
Clinton (More reasons to shop at)
Man of the Match. No idea, but I'm going for Gunnar
Show pony of the Match. Gray. Probably
Match Day minus 7 days - Kilmarnock away
None of us went. We thought about it for 10 seconds, but then decided it would be a daft thing to do.
2-0 victory, with show pony getting fouled for the penalty, and then scoring a great individual effort. Is he coming good just at the right time? Or is the pan well and truly flashed.
We will see on Saturday.
2-0 victory, with show pony getting fouled for the penalty, and then scoring a great individual effort. Is he coming good just at the right time? Or is the pan well and truly flashed.
We will see on Saturday.
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